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[liquidpathos.livejournal.com]

Who: Jay, Michael
When: After he returns from the Infirmary
Where: Their cell
What: Overcoming fears of sex
Rating: NC-17




Jay had been preparing the cell for Michael's return. He'd washed all the sheets, prepared the beds as comfy as they could be made, even gone as far as dusting around the place. He walked to the Infirmary to meet his beloved.

Michael sat on a bed, while the head doctor gave him one last look over. He saw Jay coming and his face brightened a little, though there was no smile to be found. The doctor finished up and let him go. Walking over to Jay, he looked up at the man, "hey."

"Hey Chibi." He smiled bright, leaning in to kiss the top of Michael's head. "How do you feel? You're looking better at least." He brushed his fingertips lightly over the remaining bruises. "Wanna shower now, or later?"

Michael hardly let Jay finish his question, "Later." He said quickly. But then rethought that, he needed to shower. "I mean, when no one's around..."

Jay nodded, holding out his hand to Michael. "Okay, we'll go just before the hot water goes off, there's usually no one around then."

Michael eyed the hand offered to him, "I'm not a child, Jay. I can walk back on my own."

Jay drew his hand back, shoving it in his pocket. "... Sorry. I've just missed you." He frowned a little and started to walk.

"Jay, wait." He hurried up to the taller man, "I've missed you too. It's just..... after what happened.... People already think I'm weak. I don't need to seen holding hands with someone looking like a lost a puppy." He looked apologetic, but he needed to keep what rep he had left in tact.

He shrugged his shoulders and fished out his cigarettes, holding one between his lips to light it, taking a long drag before continuing to walk. "I understand. I guess."

"Jay, wait." He walked quickly infront of Jay and stopped. Yanking on the man's shirt to pull him down for a kiss, the taste of cigarettes filling his mouth. Michael had always thought it was a pleasant taste though. "I meant what I said to you the other night. I know Imust sound like an asshole, but please.... try to understand? I don't need these coming after me every waking moment."

Jay kissed back, a little shocked at being grabbed so suddenly, pleasantly shocked, however. He smiled soft, ruffling Michael's hair. "I understand, Chibi."

Still not completely satisifed in Jay's response, Michael decided to let it go for now. "So what have you been doing all week?"

Jay shrugged, taking a drag of his cigarette. "Nothing much. Reading. Being bored. The usual."

"Are you saying that you're bored even when I'm around?" The redhead teased.

"Oh psh! You know what I mean, stupid." He said, once more ruffling Michael's hair.

"So?" He asked as they neared their cell. He could already feel the lust full eyes of the other inmates on him. He shuddered, but did his best to hide it. "How much did ya miss me?"

Jay gave a deathglare to anyone so much as looking at Michael, before ushering him inside the cell, not that it gave them much more privacy then the corridor, but still! He stroked Michael's tattoo softly. "I missed you alot."

Michael flinched a little at the soft pressure of his bruise. Damned that Mcgee. He hit pretty hard for a pussy.

Jay moved to the door, pulling the bars across, even though they wouldn't lock. "Sit down. Make yourself comfy."

Michael looked around and sat on his bunk, "It's so clean in here..."

Jay chuckled, and stubbed out his cigarette. "Well, like I said, I got bored." He smiled and walked to sit beside Michael.

"Oh..." He said looking disappointed and looked down.

Jay frowned a little at the look on Michael's face. "What's wrong, Chibi?"

"Well, I kinda had assumed that you did this f.... never mind.... it's stupid.."

"For you?" He asked. "Well... I did really, I just.... thought you didn't like it when I was sappy and said that kinda thing."

Michael shook his head, "I don't like it when you do it in front of others...." He explained.

Jay smiled soft. "I even fluffed your pillow for you."

Michael looked at the pillow wondering why it felt so awkward to be around Jay now. And then realized why. He had opened up, maybe a little more than he had wanted, and told Jay how he felt about him. He didn't know how to act around the man now. He had never told anyone that before and now he didn't know what to do with it.

"I was going to bring my pillow down and put it next to yours. The bed's big enough. But I wasn't sure if... after everything.... you know..." He blushed a little, folding his hands in his lap.

"No. I...." He looked away. Aftre a moment he stood on the edge of his bunk and brought down Jay's pillow, putting it next to his.

Jay smiled bright, watching Michael, before pulling him into a hug.

Michael stiffened slightly at the sudden embrace, an image from the rape flashing in his mind.

Jay loosened his grip when he felt Michael tense. "It's okay, Chibi. It's just me. I'm not gonna do anything bad to you."

"I know." He was quiet for a moment. "Jay. I... I haven't really told you the whole story about what happened...."

Jay's fingers found their way to Michael's hair, stroking softly. "You don't have to, if you don't want to. But when you feel ready, I'll be listening, 'kay?"

"I'll never be ready, Jay." He sighed, "The reason he was able to...." He swallowed, "He used... He had some chloreform... Even though I tried to hold my breath so I wouldnt pass out, it still made me weak and I couldn't fight back...."

Jay held onto Michael, rocking him a little. He gritted his teeth as Michael spoke, his hatred for McGee growing by the minute! "The bastard... I'm going to kill him!"

"Let me help you," He said, his eye dark with hate.

Jay nodded, holding Michael closer. "We'll do it together, and hang his dead body up for everyone to see!"

Micheal chuckled, "It sound like a plan." "Umm Jay?" Michael began looking unsure.

"Mmm? What is it, Chibi?" He asked, running his fingers softly through the man's hair once more.

"C-can I ask a favor of you?" he asked getting more nervous by the second.

Jay nodded. "Sure, Mika. You can ask me anything."

"I don't want to be scared to..... do anything with you..." He sighed, "I need you to help me get over this new fear."

He smiled and kissed Michael's head softly. "It's natural to be scared after something like that. But, I'll help you. We just have to take things slow, and explore each other all over again."

"I just...." He sighed, "I just feel so helpless. I've always been in control and was never afraid of anything until now."

"Fear isn't something to be ashamed of. Almost everyone is afraid of something."

Michael went silent for a moment before leaning forward to kiss Jay softly.

Jay kissed back, resting his hands on Michael's shoulders lightly.

Michael timidly deepened the kiss slightly. Wanting to be closer to Jay, and hating that his body was shaking out out fear of being inimate again.

Jay rubbed at the top of Michael's arms, breaking the kiss a little to whisper against his lips. "Remember. Slow and steady. No rush."

Michael nodded, still shaking slightly. He felt like he wanted to cry, but he didn't let himself.

Jay pressed his lips to Michael's again, keeping the kiss soft and gentle.

Michael kissed back softly and timidly. Trying to take it, but wanting to jump right in and get over it quick. Like removing a bandaid.

Jay purred into the kiss. "You set the pace, okay?"

Michael lay back against the pillows. "I umm...." He looked up at Jay and then away again, "I uhhh..." He sighed, "I don't want you to treat me any differently then you normally would."

Jay rose an eyebrow. "Oh? Is that so?" He let out a soft laugh and lay beside Michael, his hand instantly moving under Michael's shirt to draw circles on his stomach.

Michael tensed but forced himself to relax. "Yeah.... That's so..." He said licking his lips. The hand on his stomach feeling rather nice. It soothed him.

Jay dipped his head to capture Michael's lips once more, kissing him soft, nipping his lip.

Michael wrapped his arms around jay's neck, "Jay... I need you..." He said, not realizing that it sounded like a request for something more.

Jay trailed kisses along Michael's jaw, grazing his teeth against the flesh. One hand trailed down to grope Michael lightly. "You're sure you're ready?"

Michael closed his eyes, enjoying the attention from Jay's mouth. They snapped open again, however, when he was groped. "Wait! Jay... t-that's not what I-I meant... I just..."

Jay blushed bright, pulling his hand away quickly. "S-sorry... I thought..."

"No. It's okay." Michael pulled Jay in for a kiss, "I just meant that I need you in my life. But...." He swallowed, "I was enjoying what you were doing with your teeth." He said and pulled him down for another kiss.

Jay kissed back, smiling a little before breaking away from the kiss to resume his gentle nibbles. "You mean this?"

Michael gasped and nodded, "Yeah." He felt so unusefull, just lying there and letting Jay do all the work. He reached down and began massaging Jay's crotch lightly.

Jay moved his hand, resting it over Michael's. "Y-you don't have to do that." He moaned soft, giving Michael's jaw a nip.

"But I feel so useless, just lying here...."

Jay trailed his kisses to Michael's neck, giving a soft nip there. "Just relax and enjoy yourself."

Michael flinched alittle, the bruises around his neck still sore. He nodded, "Okay.."

Jay trailed his tongue over the bruises softly.

Michael shifted slightly as he felt himself grow a little hard. He clung onto Jay's shirt, his body still shaking a little.

Jay curled his fingers under the bottom of Michael's shirt, tugging it up a little. "Let's get rid of this?"

Michael hesitated but evetually nodded, "Okay,' He said and shifted up, making it easier to remove the garment.

Jay pulled off the shirt and laid it aside. "Wait!" He said, getting off the bed. He took his blanket and tucked it under the top matress so it hung down like a tent, before crawling back onto the bunk by Michael. "Now no one can stare."

Michael chuckled, "That's a nice thought, but what aboiut that?" He said pointing to the gap between the two bunks at the foot of the bed. It was fdirectly facing that bars of the cell.

Jay frowned, before climbing off the bunk again, grabbing a towel to try and cover the gap up. "Better?"

Michael chuckled, "Not really. You're not in here.'

Jay crawled back in and lay beside Michael, hands roaming that now exposed torso.

"There. Now that's better.'

Jay couldn't help but smile. "Now... where were we?"

Michael pulled Jay down into another kiss, pushing his tongue into the other's mouth

Jay kissed back, circling his tongue around Michael's, deepening the kiss a little.

Michael lifted a shakey hand and threaded it through Jay's hair. He felt safe around Jay, but that didn't mean that the memory of what happened didn't flash in his mind.

Jay nipped his lip lightly. "Feeling okay so far?" He asked, trailing his kisses towards Michael's chest.

Michael nodded, "Yeah. I just keep getting flash backs..."

Jay wrapped his arms around Michael, holding him close. "Want me to stop?"

Michael shook his head, "No.... I need to do this..."

Jay nodded and resumed his kisses on Michael's chest, kissing down to a nipple, flicking it lightly with his tongue.

Michael gasped and arched into the touch. His cock still only at half mast, but the rest of his body very aroused.

His thumb and forefinger teased the other nipple, while his mouth worked this one. Hos free hand trailing lightly downwards, but not touching Michael's groin.

He moaned and gripped Jays hair a little tighter, "Jay..." His hip automatically coming up to try and reach Jay's hand.

Jay let his fingers ghost over Michael's groin lightly to test the reaction.

Tears pricked Michael closed eyes, but he didn't stop Jay. He trusted him.

Jay started to unfasten Michael's pants, keeping his movements slow, giving the other every chance to stop him.

Of course Michael didn't stop him, save for one minor interuption. "Jay.... The lube....?"

Jay blinked a little. He hadn't actually been planning on going that far, not just yet at least. "You.... you sure you're ready for that?"

Michael nodded, "Yeah. I don't want to baby step it. I need to jump in head first." He chewed on his bottom lip.

Jay once more moved off of the bed to retrieve the lube, he returned with it in hand, laying it on the and stripped himself.

Michael took a deep breath, taking this moment to calm down a bit. He watched Jay strip and fridgeted with the sheet between his fingers.

"You can change your mind, you know?" Jay said as he sat naked on the bed, reaching out to stroke Michael's stomach.

"I know. but I won't."

Jay began to ease Michael's pants down off his hips. He opened the lube and gave it a sniff. "Strawberry! Yum!"

Michael lifted hips to help Jay, but rolled his eyes at his comment, "I just took whatever Kain gave me."

Jay tugged those pants off completely, before pouring some of the lube onto his hand, letting it warm up a little before nudging Michael's legs apart. "You're sure about this?"

"Stop asking me that. I'll stop it if I change my mind." He said nervously letting his legs be spread.

Jay nodded and teased a fingertip against Michael's entrance, not attempting to push in, more like stroking.

Michael's body tensed, but he stood firm and didn't stop Jay from what he was doing.

Jay dipped his head to kiss Michael's stomach, trailing his kisses down to his groin. "You need to relax more Chibi."

Michael nodded, "I know. I'm trying, really."

He licked the tip of Michael's cock, taking it in his mouth.

Michael gasped and he became a little harder, though he was still bit soft. He gripped the sheets at his side and turned his head to the side.

Jay flicked against the slit lightly with his tongue as he eased a finger into Michael slowly.

Michael screwed his eyes shut and gripped the sheets tighter, "Aah!~" He tried his best not to tense up.

Jay trailed kisses up and down Michael's length, before taking the head in his mouth once more. His free hand stroked and soothed the man's hip, trying to relax him more, as that intruding digit began to move slowly.

Michael began to breath heavily, he tensed around Jay's finger and chewed on his bottom lip.

Jay trailed his kisses back to Michael's stomach. "Mika... relax. Or it will hurt." He licked the man's stomach, nipping lightly. "We should choke him - McGee - just like I did all those women, until the light of his eyes dies just like theirs."

"Jay please..." He panted, "Don't talk about him." Though he had to admit that he did relax very slightly at the mention how Jay killed those women.

Jay wiggled his finger slightly, seeking out that sweet spot. He nibbled on Michael's stomach a little more, leaving light teeth marks. "Life is such a fragile thing."

"It's only fragile if you let it be."

"A simple hold is all it needs to be snuffed out." He whispered, easing a second finger into Michael.

Michael panted as he invisioned all the girl he had killed, the look of terror in thier eyes. His body finally began to relax.

Jay scissored his fingers, purring against Michael's stomach. "And you are the one who holds the power to led them live or die."

Michael's cock finally hardened to it's fullest and he panted harder, his hand coming up to rest on Jay's shoulders, "Tell.... Tell me more..."

Jay eased a third finger in as he retold the tale of his crimes to Michael once more.

"Jay....." He panted, "hur-hurrry..." He said trying to pull Jay on top of him.

He withdrew his fingers carefully, before applying some of the lube to his own arching hardness. He guided it to Michael's prepared entrance, and begand to push in slowly.

"Aah!~" Michael tensed slightly at the initial penetration but relax again soon after. He clung on to Jay as if he was his last life line. He screwed his eyes shut, "Wait, Jay....." He panted, "Go a little slower..... Nnngh... hurts.."

Jay nodded, biting down on his bottom lip at the tightness. He moved slower, taking his time to ease completely into that heat.

Michael still clung on to Jay, breathing hard. Once Jay was in, he began moving his hips slightly, urging Jay to move.

Jay moved slow, pressing his hands into the bed either side of Michael's head. He pulled almost completely out before easing back in. "Ngh... Mika..."

"Jay.... Haa~.... move a little faster.... I'm okay now....."

Jay let out a groan of pleasure and obeyed Michael's wishes, thrusting a little quicker and a little harder.

Aah~ Jay...." He buried his face into the crook of Jay's neck, still clinging tightly to the man.

Jay shifted the position of his thrusts a little to seek out that oh so sweet spot. He wrapped a hand around Michael's cock, stroking in time with his thrusts.

Michael cried out as Jay succeeded in his search. He lifted his head to crush his lips against Jay's. Every now and then a flash surfacing to jar him from his pleasable state. But he would quickly push it to the back of his mind, reminding himself that he was with Jay now and that he trusted him.

Jay kissed Michael back as hard, circling his tongue around the other man's, moaing into the kiss. He continued to thrust, striking that sweet spot each time, his hand working Michael's cock at the same frantic pleasure-filled pace.