(no subject)

[liquidpathos.livejournal.com]

Who: Jay, Mika
When: During lockdown
Where: Their cell
What: They discuss their feelings and stuff
Rating: R



Michael lay in his bunk still awake even though it was several hours after Jay had gone up to his bunk to crash. He didn't know why. Lights out wasn't for another 20 minutes or so. That man had some strange sleeping habits. He sighed and moved over to his locker and opened it. He needed to do this now, but he changed his mind. Even now he wasn't sure he had made up his mind 100%. He grabbed his sketch and opened it to the page that he had drawn Jay. Jay lay on the bunk staring back at him. His forearm resting on a propped up knee, his wrist hung limply and a cigarette hung loosely between his fingers. Even though Jay had been wearing a shirt that day, on the page he was bare chested.

Around the drawing of Jay were other sketches, creating a kind of border, one small sketch in each corner. In one corner was Jay's eyes; sketched in great detail, it captured the way he looked at Michael exactly. That hot, smoldering look. In another corner was Jay's lips; full, round, smooth, perfect. In one of the bottom corners was Jay's hands. One of them held a cigarette loosely, it was more or less a close up of his hand in the main sketch. In the last corner was the cross that Jay always wore. It was sketched in great detail, capturing even the tiniest detail that one would have to look twice to see on the actual piece.

Michael sighed and quickly went over to the bunk, standing on his mattress so he could see over the top bunk. He flopped the book down on Jay's sleeping chest.

Jay had found sleeping a great way of dealing with his sexual frustration, especially at times when he knew cold showers were out of the question - though there were times when it just meant he'd end up having erotic dreams. On top of that he just enjoyed sleeping!

His mouth hung open, chest rising and falling at a steady pace as his slept contently. He felt something drop on his chest and was tempted to brush it away and go straight on back to dreaming, but he cracked open an eye, glancing down at his chest, before turning his head slightly, looking at Michael.

He yawned, took hold of the book and sat up a little. "What's this?" He asked, setting on his lap. The sight that met him was surprising - in a pleasant way. "This... is the sketch you did the other day??"

Michael only nodded. He chewed on his bottom lip.

Jay rubbed his sleepy eyes before studying the picture closely, a smile curling onto his lips. He was tempted to tease Michael by saying it wasn't very good, but the redhead would probably take him too seriously. "It's really good... The detail is fantastic... I don't remember being topless though..."

Michael narrowed his eyes, "I told you, most of the time I don't realize what I'm drawing till it's done."

Jay reached out a hand to stroke Michael's cheek. "So, is this how you see me? I look pretty damn sexy in your drawing!"

Michael growled slightly.

Jay chuckled and studied the sketch again. "What made you decide to show me?"

"Being locked in a cell with nothing to do but let my thoughts wander...."

"And where did those thoughts wander to?"

Michael was silent for a moment. He seemed to be thinking and rethinking something, his mouth twisted in thought. He opened his mouth to say something but closed it and thought for a moment longer, "I think....." He finally said, "We need to talk...."

Jay nodded. "Okay. What do you want to talk about?" He asked a little apprehensively.

"Come down and you'll find out." He said and disappeared into the bunk bunk.

Jay set the sketchbook aside and jumped down to the floor, before picking the book back up, handing it back to Michael. "Okay, I'm down."

Michael rolled his eyes, grabbing him and pulling him into the bottom bunk.

Jay laughed a little, almost stumbling on top of Michael, but shifted to sit beside him.

Michael sat there, staring at the space of bed between them, not saying a word.

Jay watched Michael, reaching for his pocket to retrieve his cigarettes, but changing his mind, instead moving his hand to cup Michael's face. "So?"

"Give me a second. This isn't exactly easy for me."

"Take your time."

Michael thought about his words for a very long time. Trying to find the best way to say what he had been thinking about. He sighed. He decided he would started with a question, "Exactly...... what do you want from me?"

"Whatever you're willing to give." Jay sighed and stared at the bed. "I like you, Michael, a lot. I've made no secret about that. And it's not just lust. I've had a lot of partners - usually one night stands, but what I feel for you is far deeper than that. I love being around you, I love being near you, even when we're not doing anything."

Michael sighed, that didn't help him at all, "What would you like to happen?"

Jay shrugged. "I dunno - I kinda want us to be together..."

Michael nodded, still not looking at Jay, "Okay."

Jay cupped Michael's face again, tilting his head to look at him. "What do you want?"

Michael narrowed his eyes at Jay. Did he seriously not get that Michael just agreed to be with him? "You're infuriating," He said with obvious distaste.

Jay grinned. "And you're cute. Better learn to deal with it." He teased, leaning in to capture Michael's lips.

Michael pulled away, "Why?"

"Because I won't be letting you go any time soon."

"You better not."

Jay smiled, kissing Michael again. "I thought you hated me."

"I hate everyone."

"You hate me, yet you want to be with me? You're confusing." He purred, stroking Michael's cheek.

Michael glared, "I'm warning you now though; if you leave me. If you betray me or abandon me, I won't hesitate to kill you."

"You're stuck with me."

"Can I ask just one more thing of you?"

Jay nodded. "Sure, what is it?"

"Stop reading my journal."

Jay's eyes went wide, his cheeks flushing. "I... I... As if I would do a thing like that!"

"I'm not an idiot. I know you have been. At first I wasn't sure. But then I decided to make sure, so the second time it happened I knew."

Jay frowned. "What do you mean?"

"Well, the first time. I found a piece of fold paper that I have it in, on the ground, just under the bunk. Immediately, I thought that you were snooping but then figured it could have fallen out. So when I was in the infirmary getting a cut bandaged, I swiped a harmless chemical that reacts when it comes in contact with the oil that comes off skin. It turns blue. After I wrote the last entry, I sprayed the page with it," He leaned over and got his journal. He opened to the last entry Jay read and showed it to him. There were Jay's blue fingerprints all over the page, "I then went to that therapist guy. And asked if he could cross reference these with yours in your file. I told him if they didn't match he didn't have to tell me whose they were. I just really cared if they were yours. And guess what? They matched."

Jay frowned again, staring at the bed. "Caught blue handed, huh? I'm sorry... I know I shouldn't have been snooping, I just... I didn't know what to do..."

"Well, ultimately it led me to this decision...... I figured, you already knew what was going on in my head. So why not?" he frowned, "How much did you read?"

Jay shrugged. "Just the last few entries..."

"Okay, good."

"Why's that? Some more private stuff further in?"

"Yes. As a matter of fact."

Jay smiled. "I'm intrigued. Tell me about it?"

Michael shook his head, "Just some....... family stuff...."

Jay nodded. "Okay." He reached out, pulling Michael into a hug.

"Okay? That's it?"

"I'm sure when you're ready, you'll tell me."

Michael sighed. The truth was, he would never be ready unless Jay pestered him relentlessly. He would never give up that information on his own.

Jay kissed Michael's head, pulling him closer. "Or I could just read about it when you're asleep."

"No, you won't. 'Cause it's going in my locker from now on."

Jay chuckled softly. "Okay, I'll find some way to get the information out of you."

"Like how?"

Jay frowned. "I'll think of something."